Tuesday, April 29, 2008


Willard has been curious where his Grandparents live. I told him that Daddy's Parents live in Montana, Mommy's Parents live in Minnesota, and Great Grandma G-Lo lives in Montana too.

We are still in Montana, and we are staying at Randy's Folks. On our way to my Grandmother's house, where my parents, one of my sisters, one of my uncles, and two of my cousins are staying....

Take a breath.

On our way there, Willard was trying to compute how were were going to visit Grandma and Grandpa, and Great Grandma G-Lo at the same time.

He said...Mom, are we in Montsota?


Friday, April 25, 2008


We are heading to Montana for the weekend. The boys are pumped because they will get to see both sets of grandparents, and one of their Great Grandmas!

Everywhere we have been going these last few days, they have been telling everyone that they are going to Montana.

Today, as we were in the grocery store getting snacks and such for the trip, we ran into godsthunder, and her two youngest.

Today is her daughter's birthday, and she came running up to us. She showed us a purse she had gotten for her birthday, and Willard gave her a big hug. He said, "We're going to Montana!"

Her Daughter replied, "Hannah Montana! I love her!"


He then proceeded to sing her Happy birthday, and she felt compelled to sing it to herself as well!

It was sooo cute!

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

The Hunter...

Sometimes I feel like Steve Irwin. Whether it is socks, toys, books, water bottles or coins, my boys and I seem to have our daily hunts.

Early this morning (well, my version of early), Willard came running into our room, with huge eyes and a kleenex in his hand.

"Momma, Momma, come quick!"

I had to shake my sleepiness out...I am NOT a morning person.

Many things run through my head...Maynard got hurt (but he wasn't making a sound. Heck, he was right next to me.)...One of his toys got stuck in one of the holes in the wall...Something Diego did really impressed him...I could go on.

"I saw a Biiiiggggg Spider Momma!" He was hopping up and down like a kid on caffeine.

Lovely. Not only do I hate strongly dislike spiders, it was morning, and I am not well prepared for spider hunting from a prone position.

If it were the first time Willard had asked me to hunt down and kill a spider, it would have been different. But it seems in the last 2 weeks, spiders, or anything that crawls or moves, is a spider, and must be killed. He seems a bit obsessive about it, yet still seems as though he could crap his pants at any moment. I think he is excited to see it, yet terrified at the same time.

Maynard is also a bit freakish when it comes to creepy crawlies...he will dance on his tippy toes if he sees an ant, then proceed to bend down, and try to touch them, step on them, then come running and tell me "bider"!

In order to minimize my efforts in the dawn (ok, not really at dawn) of the day, and to avoid standing up, I asked him to show me how big it was. He touches his thumbs and fingers together to make a shape about the size of my palm.

I am a bit grossed out. I start getting the creepy crawlies, and


(Sorry, Willard came in and wanted to type Library, since we will be going there later)

Where was I?

Since I can't show fear, I asked him again what he saw, so I could gather the courage to put on my brave face, and tight khaki shorts.

It was a SPIDER momma, with legs! and it ran under Maynard's bed!

Thinking he might be exaggerating how big this ---now frighteningly big--- spider could be, I asked him to show me again, how big it was.

He showed me his interpretation on how big it was, and it didn't seem any smaller, or bigger.

I place my feet on the floor. By this time, both the kids have kleenexes in their hands and are running back and forth, ready to attack this monster living under my baby's bed.

I wasn't sure how I was going to accomplish this task. See, at one time, Randy had told me he saw a large spider running around..he said it was able to lift walls, and crawl under...but he, too, has a strong dislike of spiders.

Ok, I have to pause for a heeby jeeby break.

I grab each of the boys a banana, and tell them to sit on Willard's bed. I figure rather than destroy it, I would capture it and put it into a jar or something, at least until Randy got home to view this thing. I even had a plan on how to feed him, but I won't go there today.

I grabbed the covers off the bed, shaking them. No spider.

I grabbed the sheets and mattress pad. No spider.

I grabbed the mattress, and leaned it against the closet. No spider.

I grabbed the mattress board and leaned it against the window. No spider.

I grabbed both drawers and slowly pulled them out, expecting a spider to crawl across my foot. I would have screamed like a little girl and ran out of the house to call the Orkin Man. The kids may have had to fend for themselves. Ok...well maybe not the fend for themselves part.

No spider.

Now there are only a few things under this bed. Two batteries from a flashlight. 3 pieces of train track. 3 unused diapers. A poster board tube that the boys use to roll balls through. A teddy bear.

Not too bad...that tube was a bit ominous. I started with the teddy bear. No spider. Then the batteries and train tracks. Nope. Diapers...shook them like a mad woman...no spider.

The tube. In one hand I have a container to capture this THING. I tippy-toed over and reached down for the tube with my left hand. As I was looking down, I noticed this eeeeeeetttttyyy beeeettttyy spider, next to the tube. I kinda chuckle, and ask Willard to come and look. I then relax my feet, and wonder why my foot was caving in from a cramp.

(I had to point it out to him.) Do you see it anywhere around here?

"There it is mom! Get it quick, before it bites you!"

I have him grab me a kleenex and I get the little bugger. He was no bigger than my pinky nail.

Whoa, havea look at this lil' fella! Crikey!


Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Earth Day?

Earth Day.

This bothers me.


This is why:

Colossians 3:2

Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth.

The simple fact is...concentrating on the earth is not what we should be doing with our time.

And "things above" doesn't mean the ozone layer.

I'm not saying that I don't focus on things down here. But I try not to obsess.

The main reason why I do certain things that are "environmentally friendly", is because some things actually save us money. And then I can spend that money on good, healthy food that allows me to be healthy enough to live life in accordance to that verse.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Our Yard

Our yard looks as though it has mange. There are patches of grass, but its almost half dirt. It's the only real description I can think of that is accurate.

There are a couple benefits when you have a mange yard. Less mowing and less watering come to mind. When you have two boys who love dirt, it can almost be too easy to ship them out the door, and tell them to go play. They go to the sunny spot, a warm, dark brown mange spot that is dirt. They push it, throw it, kick it, pat it, breathe it, pile it. This picture was taken back in March:


They would do this all day long, if I let them.

Unfortunately, there is supposed to be grass right there. Now that the weather is getting nicer, I have steered them to the back yard where we have a big dirt pile that they can dig in, but the painfully bare spots in my yard are becoming a burden.

Why does our yard look like this?
a. I'm Lazy.
b. We've been in a drought for the last 7 or so years.
c. The dog has, over the last 2-3 years, destroyed our lawn by his constant running.

Here is what that same spot looked like a few days ago:


We have many other parts of our yard that look like this, and I want to solve this problem this year. My two next door neighbors both have beautiful green yards. Flowers and bird baths. Solar Lights and Roses. Ponds and waterfalls. Patios.

Not us.

I really want a nice yard and a green thumb. I do try! I have spent many, many hours outside, but my efforts seem to be in vain. I planted 22 plants in my 2 flower beds last year and all but 5 died. Oops.

I have never been able to successfully plant grass seed in the last three years. In fact, one of the reasons I put in a flower bed on the corner of our yard is because there was no grass there. But the dog made another Mud Hole right next to it, since our grass is so fragile and prone to disintegration:


This year, I plan on being more vigilant than ever, and I will post the progress, if there is any! Please Keep Me Accountable!

So far, I have raked, planted seed, covered the seed with more dirt and watered about 90% of the bare spots.

The weather has been beautiful, yet dry. I need to water the new seed at least 2 times a day, since it seems to take ages for seed to grow, and they need to stay wet.

I am also working on my base tan while doing all of this yard stuff, so I don't have to slather on the sunscreen all summer. Fortunately I am building off a nice burn tan I got last July. Now, if I could only lay out on my back for a few minutes a day without anyone seeing...

So I am off. I am going outside to water my dirt grass seed. I guess I will be taking every shower at the Y to reduce my water bill. Just kidding.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

My New Toy.

I was at a "Department Store" today. I was ordering a reel mower, so that I can still hear the boys playing while I mowed the lawn.

I glance over my right shoulder and Oh. My. There it was.

12 amp, 220 mph, 360 cfm worth of Leaf Blower (on sale of course).

Huh? What? I put in some new flower beds last summer. Willard was such a trooper helping out. He hauled many wagon loads of dirt and rocks to help me. He made good money too...enough to buy a half ton of rock at least. Or maybe a haircut or two?


Over the winter, the leaves have made my cute rocky flower beds look terrible. (And so do the tulips that have burst through the layers of newspaper and landscaping fabric. I could have SWORE I took all of the bulbs out, but they are pesky little buggers and they are about to bloom anyhow...can't argue with beautiful Tulies!)

I can't imagine WHAT I was thinking when I put the beds in, though they look nice and help increase the value of our home. When they are in tip-top shape, they look fantastic. But now my yard has MANGE and I hope it is fixable...that is another story, for another time.

Soooooo. I just had to have something to clean the rocks up a bit. Darn impulsive buys. And it has a secret thing it does too...

I take it home, take it out of the box and put the kids in the sand box. I went to the front of the house, put on my safety glasses and proceeded to annoy all my neighbors by my squeals of delight...I mean...the sound of my new leaf blower. Who knew a gal could have sooo much fun blowing leaves all over the place?

But then it gets better. After I blew all the leaves off the rocks, I made a couple of quick adjustments and switched attachments, and OH MY...Then I got to vacuum them up! IT VACUUMS!

While taking a break (actually wiping tears of joy from my eyes), I got a phone call from Randy.

Me: Hi Honey! How are you feeling? (He hasn't been feeling all that good these last few days)
R: Pretty good. Whatcha doin?
Me:Vacuuming the yard.
R: Pause.............You're what-ing the yard?
Me: Vacuuming the yard.
R: Pause.............Why are you vacuuming the yard?
Me: 'Cause it's freaking fun, and I got us a new leaf blower slash (yes, I said the word slash) vacuum today, and it rocks.
R: Ok dear, I'm glad you are happy. (You could hear the odd "I don't understand my wife" tone, and also the "when was the last time she vacuumed the living room tone" as well...It was Monday by the way.)
Me: Ok babe, I am going to go finish, I'll call you when I am done.

I was in the process of vacuuming, and sure enough...something I blew out from the flower bed into the piles of leaves lodged itself squarely into a fin thingy inside my new blower and broke a fin thing off. So now I have to go get it fixed.

My 20 minutes of fun---cut short by a rogue leaf or something. It couldn't have been a rock, since I made sure there were no rocks in the piles of leaves.

But I can't wait to get it fixed and blow the leaves out from every spot in my yard. Then vacuum them up.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Willardism of the Morning

Randy and I were laying on our bed. The bed was already made, but we were just discussing what our plans were for the day. I was still in my pajamas, and Willard came up to us. He climbed up and body slammed us, and while he was getting off, my pajama top snuck up a bit and he could see my tummy.

He started poking it, laying his head on it, just being a kid. He was talking about what he heard. He said, "I hear water in there momma, you must be hungry. I want this to be my new home!" (As he lay his head on it.) "It's soft."

We just laughed and then he said, "It must be milk, cause milk comes from your brefs (as he points to my boobs) and goes down and then down the side."

I told him that I didnt have any more milk.

He says, "OK, OK, I have an idea. We could go to the store and get some soy milk, and pour it in there (points to my belly button) and then you will have milk again!"

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Chip Heaven.

So, my new favorite thing to do is eat chips. Well, I have enjoyed it for almost 3 decades, but I have since reached perfection when it comes to eating chips, in my case, a whole bag of chips.

My all time favorite chip is Kettle Brand Spicy Thai. I can't seem to find them anywhere now. So, I have resorted to my second favorite, Sea Salt and Fresh Ground Pepper. I have found two brands that are great...Kettle, and the close second...Boulder Canyon.

Here is the quickest, and easiest way to polish off 750 calories:

1. Tear the top corner off the bag. Lick the inside. Throw it away.

2. Slowly tip the bag toward the open corner, being careful not to empty the contents on your lap.

3. Grab some chips and eat, adjusting the angle of the bag so that the chips don't come out faster than 5 mph.

4. Repeat step 3 again and again. After 3-4 Minutes, the chips should be gone. Don't cry. There is dessert.

5. Slowly tear the empty bag to the bottom and open it up to see the yummy bits caught on the creases. Feel free to catch any bits that might be hanging on the edge while this is going on.

6. Once the bag is splayed open, use your finger, or whatever, to get all the yummy bits from the corners and creases. This is CHIP HEAVEN!

7. Place the empty, open bag on the coffee table in front of you, and lay back and relax.

8. Feel guilty for the rest of the morning. And afternoon, and evening.

9. Because of your guilt, repeat the whole process.

Saturday, April 5, 2008

Yoga and Head Butting.

Today, I dropped the boys off at the Y Child Watch, while I went and attempted to do Yoga. I have been going pretty consistantly these last few weeks, and I have been learning alot. They always say you need to be where your body is, and only do what your body is letting you do. TODAY WAS HARD!

It started a couple days ago. Thursday, I went and gave blood. I was very focused during that evening's class. I had my locks, and my breathing well under control. I was feeling great. I didn't expect any side effects from donating, but there was. I managed to get dizzy twice, but I didn't fall or anything. But considering I was a pint low, I really felt great. Dizzyness isn't a normal thing I experience on a daily basis. Ditzyness, now that is another thing.

Well, today my body was not into it at all. I couldn't focus. I got dizzy several times, and I felt very uncoordinated. Wow. What a wake up call. This will be the case again in 56 days. I will have to give myself a few days afterwards to level out before I doing my normal Yoga and such. Oh, and EAT BREAKFAST! Note to self!

After I got done downstairs, I went up to get the boys.

The teacher informed me that Willard had head butted Maynard. He was on time out. The boys tend to be rough with each other, but they need to learn how to resolve things without body parts. The teacher went over to him to talk about how he could do things differently the next time Maynard started stirring things up (he has that tendancy). I was also having my own chat with Maynard about sharing, etc. After Willard got off time out, he came over to me, and I asked him to apologize to Maynard. How sweet is this:

"I'm sorry for butt-heading you."

Of Female Origin.

Last night, I went shopping, by myself, at Wally World. My husband expected me to be brief. I knew it wouldn't work out that way. He was leaving, and I needed to get some items for his trip.

I had a list of things to get. Skivvies, Compressed Air, Baking Soda, Paper Towels and Kleenex.

The undies were buy-one-get-one-free, and since they are 7 bucks a shot...I got 3, so we ended up with 6! The compressed air was locked up behind doors, and since I am not old enough to bring it to the front by myself, I had to request it at the register. I got the cutest little box of baking soda ever. Smaller than my hands. (Well, that is prety plausible since I have big hands.) I got a large pack of "Paper Toweling" as I like to call them. And I couldn't find a large box of unscented, unlotioned, undisney Kleenex.

I searched and searched. I found a cute pair of jammies for 3 bucks. 6 pair of socks for $5.88 and a few other things that shall remain unnamed. (They were found in the craft section, and it had to do with a wild hair that I got from another MOPS thing we did. No, it wasn't a hair cutting book or painting or anything. It was a craft we did. Until I know if I am capable or not, I would rather not reveal what it is...LOL)

16 items later, I found the last item on my husband's list. A large box of Kleenex.

Only two hours later, I arrived home, famished, yet relaxed. A little retail therapy is good for a person. After the kids were asleep, and I got my stuff done for the night, I was ready to show my sweet and loving husband (some of) my purchases.

Here is how our conversation went:

"OH Honey! You have to see these cute socks I got tonight since all my socks are over a year old and I needed new ones aren't they just soo cute honey? They were only 6 bucks for all six of them!"

"Well, they look like socks."

"I just think they are soooo cute. I can't wait to wear them. You know, most women don't wear nice clothes and socks to impress the guys, It's to impress the girls...if I saw a girl with these socks on I would say...Oh, those socks are soooo cute...wanna be best friends???"

Randy looked at me and said. "Oh my G******* (insert your own phrase there), you are turning into a woman."

I didn't know what to say. I actually stopped talking. Rare, but it does happen from time to time. I thought about what he said...I have enjoyed shopping more. I do have cute bras now that I am not nursing. I have been wearing mascara and lip shimmer. Oh, and I have to fix my hair now.

So, I said, "Honey, I have always been a woman, even since before we met."

"No, you are turning into a normal woman. (Here, I sorta breathed a sigh of relief, until I over analyzed it.) He could sense my confusion, and potential wrath.

"More feminine I mean," He said. "Not that I don't enjoy you being more feminine. I guess its just hard to get used too, since you haven't always been that way."

So, I did what any respectable woman would do. I sat down on the edge of the bed, bent over to take my socks off, and let one rip.

He said, "Nevermind, I take it all back."

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Letting Go.

I threw away 9 boxes today. It feels good.