Monday, October 15, 2007

Open Mouth, Insert Foot...and Leg...and Knee...

The other night while at work, a couple came in and were purchasing a two boxes of "prophylactics" (to be proper!), one small one, and one large one. Our screen showed that the large one was on sale, but the sale price wasn't being reflected. I had to un-bag the box, and scan it for a price check. Low and was a buy one get one free. Not a problem, just a bit embarrassing to have to handle that box more than once.

A couple nights later, a different couple came in, much younger than the couple I mentioned above, and they were also buying prophylactics. However, it wasn't the box on sale. The man was talking with a co-worker of mine, and his lady was reading a magazine, both attempting to focus on other things, not what they were buying, due to what it was, etc...

Now, not too often, but often enough to remember, I have said things out loud that either, I should have not said at all, or should have spoken in a clear and concise way.

Like the time I was cutting cake at a previous employer, and was thinking in my head, the big piece of cake, goes to the "big man", (who was, and still is, THE Sheriff). I would never call him that to his face (well, keep reading) but, I have little private jokes with myself going on all the time...(a whole other blog). The cake was a going away cake for me, since I was quitting to become a stay at home mom, not because of the incident that followed...(I was 9 months pregnant at the time.)

So in walks the Sheriff, and I say "Well, there is the Big Man himself!"...loud enough for everyone to hear, including him, and the whole room went silent. Not whispering to each other silent. Silent like Sprint-hearing a pin drop-silent. I was ready to crawl under the table and never come out. I was beyond embarrassed.

Eventually the whole room was roaring, and I was as red as the maroon shirts they had us wear. So, after we all had our cake, and calming down from the "incident" (we should have had a de-briefing meeting..J/K), he was going to give a speech. Everyone was chit-chatting away, so he said..."Excuse me, the Big Man would like to say something" (or something like that, all I know is he referred to himself as the Big Man, and I was red all over again during his speech.) DOH!

So, that is one time where I should have kept my thoughts inside my head, instead of blurting them out on a whim.

This night in the Grocery Store though, I was TRYING to make my words come out right, and I told him that "The big ones are on sale". He just looked at me funny. The lady just dropped the magazine on the floor, everyone turned red, and then I started giggling and then we all busted out laughing.

What made it worse, is that in my nervousness, I kept trying to explain what I was saying, but we were all too shocked to care. They didn't get the bigger box, and I haven't mentioned a sale like that to anyone since!