This made me laugh so hard, I cried!

Earlier today, I sent out a bulletin titled: Motorcycle Survey. Not expecting it back from too many people, tonight, when I got home from work, I was surprised to see a message from one of my dear friends...who shall be unnamed right now.

She is a mother of 2 small boys, like me, and her answers are just hilarious. I included it below, but made sure the names are not on it:

Please enjoy:

1.What type of motorcycle do you own? sport,cruiser,dualsport,offroad?
ummm....a toy one. 2 actually....

2.What make?
I think.....Mattell??? No lead paint tho. I think they are called M2R??? and the other.....alpinestar

3.What model?
no 'born on date', we just bought it hmmmmm......3 weeks ago!

4.What color?
one green (lime green) the other orange. both have white and black too.

5.Does it get looks when you ride?
Ya......I look like a gorilla riding a bike....hahahahahaha!!!!

6.How many cc's?
hmmmm.........I think alot....have you seen my bicep....especially when I push them around with the little men on them!

7.Top speed?
As fast as my chunky a** can carry 'em!

8.How much horsepower?
Ya.....I got horsepower baby!!!!.....and then, so do they!!! VROOM VROOM!!!!

10.Any Modifications?
Does gorilla glue to hold on the handle bars count?

11.1/4 mile?
Unsure....I may collapse before then!

12.0-60mph?
a life time

13.0-100mph?
I think I'm in the hospital....or my grave. GASP....I may not make it!

14.Dry weight?
right around 2 ounces each....and I did weigh them...hahahaha!

15.Fuel tank capacity?
0.....pure imagination to run these bad boys!

16.Fuel economy?
depends on what we ate that day to keep us up and playing!

17.Gears?
can't really tell, depends on who's playing. My youngest usually makes at least one down shift noise!

18.Can you wheelie it?
OHHHHH YEA............some times for several minutes from one mountain (sofa) to the the other (Chair).....huge dare devils!!!!

19.Which motorcycle rivals yours?
Well, today I was the orange one, and my youngest out did me with the green one.......

20.What is your next bike?
Well......if these hold out, and they grow out of the 'dirt bike' phase, perhaps none.........or a two wheeler pedal bike! HA!

21.What kind of tires do you have?
well...they are plastic and rubber, tiny, white plastic spokes....looks like some good tred.......

22.Do you have matching gear?
Oh ya, the guys come with matching gear, racing suits, removable helmets....(I think I stepped one one today), chest protectors, even small tools! quite the set up!

23.Full face, sport,half helmet, no helmet?
They have open face helmets, about the size of my pinky nail!

24.Would you sell your bike?
Well....they boys would be upset....but......I could part with them for about.....$5 apiece.....not all pieces may be present, one helmet may be broke (slightly smashed)

25.What is its best feature?
The joy they bring the boys when playing

26.Does it have a name?
motorcycle or dirt bike...I couldn't even begin to type the way my youngest says it.

27.Do you ride with a passenger?
ummmmm no, I haven't seen them put more than one guy on at a time........we do have rules......hahahahaha

28.Is your back seat open?
well....I guess so.

29.Are you a female rider?
Ummmm, yes, not so much a rider, but more an operator....again the gorilla/bike analogy.......

30.Do you ride in a group?
well, at least a group of two. How ever sometimes we do have out the snowmobiles and John Deere and Bob the Builder tractors to group play/ride with.......

31.Are you in a motorcycle club? If so whats it called?
Well, we tried inviting over the Hell's Angels for juice boxes and gold fish crackers....but they turned us down....again....DAMN.....one of these times!!!!!

32.Whats the farthest you've ridden?
Well, we did venture to the front yard once....but broke down, hence the gorilla glue, so, we usually stay between the bedroom and living room.

33.Whats the best thing you've seen?
The looks on their faces when they got them the first day.

34.Whats your next trip?
To the toy box tonight

35.Do you speed?
Ya....sometimes withut shifting.......I should start writting them out tickets......

36.Do you race?
Ya.....sometimes against Muck, Scoop, a big John Deere.....

37.Can you outrun the police?
Ohh.....yes, one time we did have the sheriff from Cars out..... rough one, didn't think we'd make it!

38.Can you stunt your bike?
YA!!!! You should see the "pop in the wheelies" I get to watch, and the big jumps I get to watch (see 18). "watch this mom, watch this mom....watch this mom"......over and over again!!!!!!

39.Do you have a pic?
I could take one if you'd like..........

40.Share info on your own motorcycle!
Its a motorcycle, it is fun. everyone should own one...

Cold Milk!

Children are so amazing. Some days you want to hug and kiss and play all day with them, and other days you just try to get through the day without pulling all your hair out.

The boys and I were getting ready to go the grocery store this morning. I was getting dressed, and noticed in the mirror that I was a little cold at the moment. Use whatever phrase you wish, but lets just say...the turkey was done!

Willard came into my room and asked, "What you doing?"

I said, "Trying to find some breast pads."

"Why you need pads?"

"We are going to the grocery store and it is cold in the grocery store."

While we were talking I found some pads from back when I first started nursing, and was starting to put them into my bra.

Willard looked up at me and asked, "So your milk doesn't get cold?"

I just leaned over and kissed his cheek.

So observant, yet so innocent...

Ok Bye

*First of all, any immigrant who comes to the US, should be required to learn English. *Second, when in line at the grocery store, get off the phone!

I was at work the other night and this sweet little lady comes through the line, talking up a storm in her native language. It was probably Chinese. She has been in the store before, so I just starting scanning her order. She does speak good English too, by the way.

I am ringing up her order, and she is chatting away very quickly in Chinese, then she says Ok, Bye, then she starts another conversation, either another call, or someone else got on the phone on the other end. I wasn't quite sure I heard her right.

I hear (please excuse me for my bad Chinese.) dong shi so ti do ma tah jah mo... Ok, Bye.

I almost cracked up laughing right there! I just couldn't believe she would have an entire conversation in one language and then end it like that.

Anyhow, I was amused. From now on, when I hang up the phone I am going to say Näkemiin. Or, maybe not...

American Idol

One of the shows Randy and I watch together is American Idol. It's not our favorite, but we tend to disagree a lot with each other on who should win, not necessarily the judges opinions. We do get to talk and get all worked up together, and have little bets and such, so it is all in good fun.

One of the things we disagree on is the way the judges act in the tryouts.

For instance, it makes him mad that the judges like to laugh, make fun, etc at the contestants. I don't think their behavior is very couth, but the show has ratings, and it isn't because everyone can sing. However, I consider myself a pretty reasonable person, and am able to carry a tune (albeit a slight one!) I used to sing in choir, and had aspirations when I was younger to sing. But, I wouldn't try out for AI because 1. I know I am not good enough, and 2. I don't handle people laughing at my expense very well. Knowing this, I don't choose to put myself into that position that could get me nationwide ridicule!

So anyway, my point is, if someone CHOOSES (after all they are not forced!) to go on AI and expect the judges to love you, and they don't, stop being surprised that they act the way they do! It makes good TV. It has been around for 6 seasons now, and if you can't take the heat, don't go into the kitchen.

Oh, and what is worse? The people who come out after being told no, and they start talking badly about the judges. That makes them look like idiots. So not only can you not sing, you can't take it like a man either.

The funniest thing was the cousin who told the judges he was going to act out, for the t.v., and ended up yellin' and screamin' for show. THAT was funny. He knew he wasn't the best, and he was doing it with the right attitude. His cousin ended up making the Hollywood round, and he was happy for him...kudos to you!

Ok, I have said what's on my mind... HeHe